Paul or PD as we call him is one of the most amazing people I know. He's in the hospital right now fighting for his life. While waiting for the desperately needed bone marrow transplant he got a fungus in his lungs and now he's trying to recover from that enough so that he can start the process of destroying what's left of his existing bone marrow so that he can have the new transplant marrow from a donor in switzerland. Finding a donor with so many matching requirements is rare and they found one. This man is an angel for PD. PD deserves one in his court because he has been one for others.

PD has been a selfless little brother. He sacrificed his own health to try and save not just one but two of his older sisters. In 1988 he donated his bone marrow through the process of extraction which meant they had to screw through the bone to extract marrow over 100 times. (When I was tested to see who I matched they extracted some of my marrow and the process is extremely uncomfortable. I can still feel where they did the procedure. I can only imagine the pain he must have gone through for his sisters) After that extruciating experience the marrow didn't graft, so he donated again. The poor guy limped and had a hard time sitting and sleeping for a long time because they extracted the marrow from the bones from his upper backside. Unfortunately, it didn't take again and my sister Paula died in the BMT Unit in California.

In 1991 he donated his bone marrow again through the extraction style now for the third time. This time for Michelle. Shortly after healing from that surgery, and was there supporting my sister while she suffered through all the horrific procedures they did in the BMT experience, she did not graft. This was devastating. PD didn't hesitate he jumped and was preparing to do the surgery again, when to all of our dismay, my sister died from a fungal infection in her lungs.

He has been so selfless and supportive his whole life. When my brother Mathew was in the hospital in 2003 for his bone marrow transplant, Paul sat by his side day after day after day. He couldn't donate his marrow this time because he wasn't a match, he would have at the drop of the hat. My sister Joleen donated her stem T-cells a new way that marrow is harvested. This time the BMT worked and Mathew survived. Now Mathew is returning the favor and is being there for PD for his BMT.

Paul has been a loving kind person. He deserves to have this transplant work. He deserves to recover and to live a full life. May God please please bless this young man and give him a long life.

Yummy new (to me) sandwich I've been making alot lately -

scrabbled egg
bacon strips
tomato
lettuce
avacado

on toasted bread

It's easy and yet so yummy. We've also made it into a triple decker and added homefries (or hashbrowns) with alittle ketchup on them, too. We call that sandwich the ultimate breakfast sandwich.

Being Overlooked -

I've been dwelling on the matter of how our family has been overlooked in this new ward, we moved into last January. We have had to beg and beg for home teachers and still no one comes, and it's at the end of August, not one visit, we don't even know who they are. I had to repeatedly beg for visiting teachers. When I finally got a visit, several months after being in the neighborhood, when one of them came to the door she wouldn't come in and said "I'm lame, I don't do visiting teaching, I'm too busy so this is what you get" I stood there in total confusion. Seriously then don't accept a call to be a visiting teacher. Don't wait several months to finally visit and then insult the sister by saying your lame and don't do visiting teaching.
We've asked for callings, I've asked to be a visiting teacher repeatedly, and I've asked for help and have been totally ignored. I don't understand that. I don't understand a ward, especially a bishop who is in charge of a ward, who desperately needs people to fill callings, refuses to call willing and motivated and eager members to serve in callings. Does that make sense? No. We haven't transgressed to disallow us to serve, we go to church, we pay our tithing, we have family scripture study and prayer. So, why would a bishop not want to put good members to work serving in his ward? I can only think of one reason, he has a thing against people who rent, which we do. I have had this experience before in another ward years ago, the bishop never did call us to anything. It's strange. I am so hurt by the fact that somehow somewhere this ward's leadership for some unknown reason doesn't think it's important to fellowship and support this family. How awful.
I just found out that the home teachers I've been begging for to visit us, fellowship us, love and care for us is the bishop himself. Seriously what bishop would totally dis a family. We have gone to him requesting home teachers and he got seriously defensive and at that time we didn't know he was our home teacher, we were soooo confused at his reaction, now it makes a little sense, he must be feeling a little guilty, not enough to come and be our home teachers but enough to be defensive and rude.
I hope that this is an isolated situation. I hope other families don't have to feel sooooooo neglected and ignored. I know that's not how I feel and believe that Heavenly Father and Jesus want their faithful servants to feel or to be treated.
All I can think of and am determined to do is to move away from such poor treatment. Maybe church isn't worth going to here. It is a sad day when the leadership in this ward are so insensitive and disrespectful to it's members. I'd really like to call him on it and make him repent, but I don't think it's worth the effort. Anyway. I'll be alright. (once we move)

Playdough -

Make your own homemade playdough today! Kids love it and I love it because it's easy cleanup and it entertains them for hours. It keeps in the fridge in plastic baggie for another day of play.

PLAY DOUGH

Combine: 2 1/2C Flour
1/2 C salt
1 T alum
In 2 C boiling water add
2 T cooking oil
food coloring
Then pour liquid over dry mixture, stir with heavy duty spoon, when cool enough dump out on floured surface countertop, kneed for about 5 minutes. Add flour as needed to make it pliable.

My children have always loved this playdough. Lately I've been using my old flour and oil. It's better than throwing away the old stuff, plus I get quite time for so long. Alittle messy but it's worth the peace and quite. Also, the children are being creative and using their minds and hands. So, that's cool, too.

Washing Machine - I'm so grateful for washing machines

The other day my washing machine stopped working. I checked things out for myself, then my husband checked it out and we both didn't find anything obvious. The next day I called for the repair man, he was supposed to show up by late morning or early afternoon. Well, we all know he didn't show up til after 3 pm. He spent the next two hours reading his downloaded instruction papers trying to figure out what was wrong with it. I understood it about as good as he did. I was thinking that if I wasn't there it would have taken him 8 hours or more to figure it out. His papers he down loaded from the internet were even stapled in the wrong order. After all the tests and stuff, I kept saying it was the main circuit board, he kept saying it was the motor. So, he called long distance on my home phone to the company Whirlpool and sat on it for over 20 minutes answering all the questions the tech had to say and the tech agreed with me. When the repair man figured out he couldn't do anymore that night and the part had to be ordered he started filling out the paperwork on what to charge me, I'll give him this, he was smart enough not to charge me the full two hours of him reading the papers and sitting on the phone. It still cost me $114. I know it could have been so much worse. Now it was after 5pm and of course he couldn't call on the part needed which ended up being the brains of the machine (main electronic circuit board assembly). This was Friday night. I wash 2-3 loads of laundry every day. I was already about 5 loads behind and it was accumulating very quickly.

Over the weekend I got to thinking, that this main brains part was going to cost me several hundred dollars to get it and have this company put it in. I was also aggravated with the fact that this machine was less than 2 years old. I got the biggest baddest heavy dutiest machine on the market at the time. (At that time, I couldn't afford the extra year warranty which was $100.00 and tenth more than the machine.) I was thinking at the time I purchased the machine, Whirlpool, I've owned several machines by Whirlpool and they have always been awesome. Plus, a big name brand company, they should build the biggest baddest heavy dutiest machine like they claimed.

On Monday, now I'm climbing over stacks and stacks of laundry in nearly every room of the house, because by now there wasn't any more room in the laundry hallway (it's just wide enough to hold the two machines and a walk space). I decided that I was going to call Whirlpool direct and talk to a representative and find out if this is a epidemic with their machines or is this a fluke? Well, after talking with the rep and the supervisor I was told I could get 1/2 off the replacement part and a 1 year warranty. I was like . . what? . . .the part wears out after the year mark and before the 2 year mark, so a year warranty is totally bogus. She then offered a counter offer of sending me the replacement part with no warranty. I was like . . .thank you . . . and that's acceptable to me. Now remember this was Monday morning.

I replayed the phone conversation with anyone who would listen about the offers from Whirlpool and my responses and such, and how I got them to warranty their machine by sending me the replacement part at no expense to me. Would you believe that Tuesday before lunch the Fed-X guy delivered my new replacement part. I was so excited. I did the happy dance. I opened the box, made sure the part was the right part and clipped it in myself. It took me all of 2 minutes. Turned on my machine and magic, I had my mac-daddy washing machine back.

I called Whirlpool and made sure they knew how much I appreciated their professional attitude and response to my request. Not very many company's take care of their consumers once they've got your money, but they did. I told them that I was one happy customer for their respect and quick professional manner in which they handled my case. I also had to make sure to let them know that I was swimming in dirty laundry and their quick response was doubly appreciated. My two little beaty eyes poking out from on top of the mountain of laundry was totally happy to have my washing machine back in production.

I love automatic washing machines. They make my life easier and they get my clothes clean. I am SO truly grateful I don't have to hand wash and beat all the dirty clothes on a rock to try to get them cleaner.

I LOVE WASHING MACHINES!!!

I've got something special for you . . . .

Here's a little funny. . .

The other day while standing out in the back yard my youngest daughter was looking up at the airplanes flying overhead. She was saying hi to them and telling them that she loved them. Then I overheard her say to the next jet that was flying fairly high almost out of sight, she said...
"Come alittle closer, I have something very special for you."

I just had to laugh. I've been trying to think of an instance of where she may have heard something similar and I think she learned that from her brother because he's always trying to get her to obey me and so he says things to her to try and convince her to do what she's been told to do and listen to her mother.

Prayer - I've been thinking. . . .

I was once counselled by a Stake President to say a personal prayer for 7 minutes a day for a week. Now, that didn't seem so bad until I tried it. I've done full sincere prayers before, but after a few days, finding 7 minutes of stuff got more and more challenging. Part of his counsel included setting a timer to make sure it lasted long enough (kinda funny huh). Now part of the reason, he said, was that when you pray for the full 7 minutes a day, it gets you down to the real stuff not just the regular patterned surface stuff. I can say that it gave me a deeper appreciation for the life around me, the people around me, and for all that I've been given.
I was thinking, a-ha, I've got it. I gained deeper meaning and gained deeper appreciation. That's what he wanted me to learn. I scored. Well. . . . . that wasn't the end of the learning.

When the next appointment came around I reported of the success of the week of deep prayer, which I ended up doing for much longer. He was pleased about the growth that I had gained. But he was setting me up for something else, he then assigned me to pray for a whole 7 minutes for and behalf of my husband. Now that one really got me. Quite frankly, I was angry with the Stake President because I was not in a positive mind-frame to be thinking about my husband in any way like that and certainly not interested in the least about praying FOR him. No. . . . No. No. No. NO! If I'm praying for anyone, it's for me. Because I've got so much to learn and grow and need the divine intervention for. Certainly I didn't want to waste my time praying for my spouse. no. nah. I'm not doing it.

Well. . . . . . . I relented and tried it.

I discovered that if I disconnected myself from our relationship (long disconnect) and thought of him solely as a child of God, a son of God, I could think of things to pray for and in-be-half of him. Of course, I started out with all the surface stuff. Ya know, bless him at work so he can do a good job; bless him to be a good dad, blah blah blah. Then, I started thinking about him more and got to thinking about what he really may need as a child of God. He certainly needed a wife who was understanding (which I'm not so good at), he needed to feel love from His Heavenly Father, he needed to have the ability to discern the promptings of the Holy Ghost, he needed to gain a greater knowledge of the scriptures, he needed to gain a better understanding of his duties as a husband and father (the heavy stuff), and so on and so on. . . . . .After a couple days of this, then I got to thinking . . . .what would Jesus pray for him, if he were going to pray for and in-behalf of him - what would that prayer be like? . . .then the subject matter got deeper and closer to pure thoughts.
Sadly to say I didn't try it long enough because a week wasn't enough to change much of anything that I could tell and I gave up. I wonder if a commitment of let's say a month, well that may be way too much to chew all at once, especially for the way I've been feeling towards him again lately. Maybe a month of a sincere thought out prayer for a couple minutes a day for a month. Hum. I'll have to give it some more thought. I don't know. Maybe I'll try it another month, this month I don't like him very much. . . . .oh, no . . . . that means I probably need to pray for him even more because of all the garbage feelings I have towards him. mmmmmmmmmmmmm. . . . . .I don't know if I could stay on my knees long enough, (ya know, the old addage. . . .stay on your knees until you feel like praying. . . .I just don't know about that today)

I've got a yummy healthy bread recipe I learned from a neighbor.

Deonna's Wheat Bread (4 loaves) ( like bigger loaves so I make 3 sometimes)

4 C "warm" water (I use a quart jar because it's four cups exactly)
2 T yeast (I keep the container and the Tablespoon in the freezer ready to go)
1/2 C Sugar
4 C Whole Wheat Flour (I keep the Cup in the flour bucket ready to go)
------------Mix, set aside lightly covered (shower cap-sprayed inside with pam) in large plastic bowl for 45 minutes to 1 hour. The mixture will be bubbly and spongy looking. Don't be afraid of the goo.
------------then add

1/2 C vegetable oil
1 heaping T salt
2 T Dough enhancer (this helps make softer bread, get some from a health food store, some
grocery stores and I've even seen it at Walmart in the grocery section by the flour)
1/2 C Wheat Gluten (same places for this) (Now I keep these two things in their own container
with the proper measuring utensils stored in them so they are ready to go)

-------------Mix well enough to be combined, then add
2 C Wheat Flour
2-3 C White Flour
-------------Mix well enough that the ingredients are combined. I start with a spoon til most of the stuff is mixed then I dump it out on the floured surface countertop and then I kneed it with my hands so that it's incorporated together. Don't over kneed, this is lazy bread. The stuff should be slightly sticky/soft. Just make sure the ingredients are combined then set aside in the messy plastic bowl you've been using all along, lightly covered for 1 hour +

Knock down and kneed dough to get air bubbles out, cut into 4 (3 for me) equal sections, roll in loaf shape, set in lightly greased loaf pan (I use pam), set aside for 1 hour+

Bake 350 degrees oven for 25 minutes.
Cool on rack, takes half a day to cool down enough to put into bags so they don't sweat and make your bread all sweaty. Even if you leave them out alittle too long you think cuz they feel alittle hard, they do soften up in the bag some.

Tip: leave plastic bowl out to air dry because it makes for easier clean up after the flour gooie mess is dried out, the stuff will easily fall out, then wash with very little water. So, this technique says on excess water useage.

Happy Baking. It's yummy yummy bread.

I've been thinking. When a marriage is sour what can you do to sweeten it up or can it be done?

I've tried so many things over the years to make or should I say create a pleasant marriage. Two different people with way different perspectives with way different life experiences with way different ways of handling things. How can this work? So far, in my marriage it's a constant struggle. We communicate so completely differently that it's near impossible to even think of getting along.

I go to church, I read books on the subject, I research on the subject, I read articles published by the church on the subject, but I still am at a loss at how or what can be done or can it really be done.

In the April Conference 1995, Elder Joe J. Christensen of the Presidency of the Seventy's talk said,
"Marriage and the Great Plan of Happiness"

Now I'm thinking he's saying that marriage is part of the plan of HAPPINESS. Lucky him. His wife must be a doll. I don't see really that HAPPINESS is truly obtainable for most folks.

So, here's some of his advice in a nutshell.

1. Remember the central importance of marriage.
"There is nothing in this world as important as the creation and perfection of family units."

2. Pray for the success of your marriage.
Elder Kimball (at the time) shared this wise counsel:

"Well, don't just pray to marry the one you love. Instead, pray to love the one you marry."

3. Listen.
Make the time to listen to your spouse; even schedule it regularly. Visit with each other and assess how you are doing as a marriage partner.

4. Avoid "ceaseless pinpricking"
Don't be too critical of each other's faults. Recognize that none of us is perfect. We all have a long way to go to become as Christlike as our leaders have urged us to become.

Few people have ever changed for the better as a result of constant criticism or nagging. If we are not careful, some of what we off as constructive criticism is actually destructive.

5. Keep your courtship alive.
Make time to do things together----just the two of you. As important as it is to be with the children as a family, you need regular weekly time alone together. Scheduling it will let your children know that you feel that your marriage is so important that you need to nurture it.

That takes commitment, planning, and scheduling. It doesn't have to be costly. The time together is the most important element.

6. Be quick to say, "I'm sorry."
As hard as it is to form the words, be swift to say, "I apologize, and please forgive me," even though you are not the one who is totally at fault.

True love is developed by those who are willing to readily admit personal mistakes and offenses.

7. Learn to live within your means.
The time may have come to get out the scissors and your credit cards and perform what Elder Holland called some "plastic surgery"

8. Be a true partner in home and family responsibilities.
The task of caring for home and family is more than one person's responsibility.
Remember that you are in this partnership together.

Okay, that's all good advice we have all heard it before in one way or another. So, seriously when a marriage is sour can anything really be done to sweeten it up?

1. Remember the central importance of marriage.
So, what if you're at the point where you don't care about the importance of marriage with the person you're with. What if you're at the point that I'd rather throw it away and try someone new. Does that work for most people?
I've stayed married because I've been repeatedly told how important marriage is. I've stayed married for the children because they say divorce is detrimental to them. I've stayed married because the experts say that most people bring their problems into the next marriage, and the next marriage really isn't much different than the first - just different people - different problems, not necessarily better, just different.
So, if you couldn't pick the right mate for yourself the first time who says you'll be able to pick the right person the next time. Is it just luck? So, is it worth the family break-down for a lucky break? Gamblers do it all the time, some get lucky but at what expense? Most don't get lucky at all, they have just complicated their original problem. So, if I don't have much conviction on marriage anymore how can I replace it with conviction? Or is that luck as well.

2. Pray for its success.
Now, here's the pessimist in me. I feel that when you pray for something, especially something specific, then all the trials come and additional patience is required. So, why pray if it appears to get far worse?

3. Listen.
Seriously, do men ever listen? I think they put up with, tolerate, or just plain wait til your done, the whole while tuned out to what you said or the meaning behind what you said. I have tried this listening thing and really listening to what is said, not what I think they are saying or relating it to what is meant by my own experience. I'll admit it's mostly with my children. My spouse doesn't talk much about relationships, if an when he talks at all, its about his interests in deer hunting, hiking, flint-knapping, or now it's cage fighting. I'm so not interested in those things so out of fairness I don't listen much. So, we don't talk much about much. I say things all the time about what I'm thinking, my opinion about stuff which is nearly everything, and my struggles with our relationship which I'm convinced he could care less about, so, that's a problem for us both.

4. Avoid "ceaseless pinpricking."
Now this seems to me directed strictly towards women because I think a lot of us are good at pinpricking. Now in our defense it's because we have to raise children and we are to guide and direct them. So, because we have to guide children when we turn to our spouses we guide them, which generally isn't positive because positive doesn't stand out because it feels good what stands out is the negative because it feels so bad. So nagging, pinpricking or whatever you want to call it, is just an attempt to make the unpleasantness to stop. Unfortunately, in my experience it never stops, so, the reminding of the unpleasantness continues and the unpleasantness continues because I'm reminding I don't like it. Endless cycle.

5. Keep your courtship alive.
Okay. . . . . . .dating, I was told once that doing things that once interested the both of you is a good way to rekindle those old feelings. Well, I tried that it's fine and all, but if you don't like your spouse much what's the incentive to do activities with them. I've tried dating with him, lately going to the movies is fun for me because I've liked the movie itself. But the last couple of movies have reminded me how unsatisfying my relationship is. I know, I know, you're thinking movies are dream land type life scenarios, but with knowing that I still came away crying wishing that my relationship resembled even a little more like the love story I just watched.

6. Be quick to say "I'm sorry"
Yes. . . . totally good advice. My problem is that I don't feel I'm wrong very often, well, to be honest I hardly ever think I'm wrong. So, I guess I need this the most. I've worked at saying I'm sorry to my children more often lately, but I'm still real clumsy at it. Maybe if recognizing that being sorry for contributing to the conflict, or understanding the personality defect that causes the regular problems would be a good reason to say sorry and mean it. Tee-hee-hee. No seriously. I think there is something to feeling or being sorry for the imperfections (I guess this is the repentance part) and what those imperfections do negatively to your relationship is a good start to improving the down swings to the relationship. Huummmmmm

7. Learn to live within your means.
Well, this is pretty much self explanatory. But from experience if you can live well within your current means when the economy tanks it won't have as big an affect on your life. Sometimes even if you've planned well bad things still happen. But I think that all that practice of living within your means helps in the process of restructuring when the bad times hit. Maybe the hit won't be as hard for you.

8. Be a true partner in home and family responsibilities.
Now ladies, we all know that men don't really do a whole lot around the house. Any woman who lucks out and gets a man that is observant and thoughtful and willing to actually pitch in more is one lucky lady. (I'd like to meet her). For the rest of us, we basically are the ones who do the majority of the housework, (in my case the yard work too), laundry, child rearing, grocery shopping, cooking, bookkeeping, tax prep, bill paying, decorating, homework, chore charts, planning and carrying out Family Home Evening - family activities - family prayer - family scripture study, making sure everyone is ready for church and trying to get them there on time (real hard to do when you can't find the shoes for the little one, again), the list goes on and on; so, pretty much we do a mountain of work and they, weellllll, don't do as much of that stuff. They plan to play - golf or raft or hike or hunt or fish or sports or four-wheel or or or or or; but when it comes to planning a date with his "sweetheart" his brain turns into goo and he all of a sudden can't remember a thing.

So, what do you do? More just thinking another time.